Today I feel single, truly single, I can’t tell after how many years.. and weirdly this feeling of singlehood also brings with it a feeling of wholeness. For example…
- Finally feel like there’s nobody you’d rather be spending time with than yourself
- You don’t keep checking your phone expecting someone’s text
- You don’t keep avoiding your phone to avoid the disappointment staring back at you from the blank notification bar
- You don’t keep wondering in the back of your mind, what more you could have done
- You don’t keep wondering in the back of your mind, what more you can still do
- You don’t feel like you’re missing out on the greatest show on earth, but you weren’t worthy enough for a ticket
- You don’t keep thinking about the moments and talks you had
- You don’t keep thinking about somebody’s cute nose, luscious hair, or weirdly attractive shoulder bones
- You don’t keep checking WhatsApp or Instagram for the latest byte you’re missing
- You don’t keep thinking about what you shouldn’t have said, or what you should’ve said instead
- You don’t think what if……….
And that is the biggest reason for this ecstatic feeling of wholeness. Today, I’m not thinking what if. Today, I’m not feeling insecure about my choices. Today, I feel glad, that I’m able to see people objectively and understand the choices they made without feeling that a thousand questions are unanswered.
Today I’m secure.. nay, even thankful, about what happened, and what didn’t. It all turned out for the best.