Yeah, I have been looking for an inspiration ever since I have come to Kota. I had decided upon IIT for one simple reason. I had decided that as IITians get the highest paid jobs, I’d work for like 5 years, and then go to LA to join a film institute to become a director, as I wanted to join Hollywood and get in touch with HD. But, as that one-itis was dropped, I wasn’t sure what to do, and decided to go for IIT only.

But, I have been suffering ever since I have come here. I don’t want to study hard, I want to enjoy life. And today IITians have to do MBA to get good jobs, and I think that the salary would have been good enough even if I did an MBA after doing CA or something. I don’t have anything that can keep me going, something that can inspire me to study, no real motive, nothing, cuz the standard of IIT has really dropped in my eyes after getting to know how stuff works there.

Also, I have been really disappointed with Bansal Classes. I thought that people came here to gain knowledge, not just learn the same old stuff, but boy, was I wrong. Their only aim is IIT, which might work for most people, but doesn’t for me. I have a thirst for knowledge, not for cramming. And even the IITs are only about the GPA.

So due to lack of inspiration, my mind has been looking around. Strangely, my oneitis have returned, yes both of them. I notice every girl walking past me, which I never did before. Maybe I’m spoiling myself, but I understand that my mind is looking for inspiration. I don’t know what to do. I think that if I don’t get a good batch after the first test, maybe I’ll go back. I mean what is the use of living without facilities, when you don’t even want to do what you have come to do.

I don’t know if it’s wrong or right, I’m totally confused, more than I ever was.

P.S. I forgot to tell you all, It was my 16th birthday on 18th April.


Author: Jas A.

I think my picture describes me the best, a 21 yr old loner. Computer is my life and I used to be very good in studies, I mean very good, but I've been declining since 9th grade and lost interest. I have one passion in life "Movies", but I can't pursue direction cuz its not stable, and I love money, so I've decided to become a software engineer. Well, that's me, what about you?

11 thoughts on “Inspiration………….”

  1. Congratulations on turning 16!

    And as far as everything else is concerned, well dude, I can only say one thing and it will sound very redundant. Try to actually figure out what you want to do in life. IIT might not be your goal, it might be something else. I realized only too late what mine was and ended up screwing 2 years of my life. And I might have to screw one more. I don’t want you to do that. Ask yourself questions like why do you wanna be an engineer. Does it really interest you? and stuff like that. Don’t carry on at Kota if you don’t think you’re gonna work hard. But then don’t repent later. Visit a career counselor if possible and find out what you really wanna do. Then convince your parents to let you do what you want. That’s the only way you’ll be happy, I believe.

  2. Congratulation. And happy belated birthday. 🙂
    The irony of the situation is that we are asked to make such a big decisions of our life at such a small age, when we are completely uncertain of what we want to do. So, we end up doing what others want us to do. 😐
    We belong to various categories.
    There are some like me, who go with the flow. Whatever comes, choose the best out of it and move ahead. I don’t know what I wanted to be or what I have become. Whatever it is, I am happy with my life.
    Other category have well defined dreams. They act on it. As Simran’s mom said in DDLJ – Sapnay dekho par unke pure hone ki shart mat rakho, such people have to keep a backup so that if the dream does not work out, they have an outlet.
    Decide, which category you belong to and act accordingly.

    As Ish said, meet a counselor. It will be helpful. He will make you decide, if you haven’t decided yet.

  3. Happy Belated Birthday Perx! 🙂

    Wish I could give you some wise words, lol, but I’m the last person to be giving anyone advice. So whatever you do, just make sure you’re happy doing it…

  4. @ish
    No man, engineering doesn’t interest me even 1%. Counsellers? I went to three of them with 0 results, I mean they advice you, but they don’t suggest a path, or tell u about ur interests.

    Man, I don’t know which category I belong to………. I guess I do need a backup, cuz that’s how I had planned it….. I don’t know man, I’m so confused, should I waste the money already deposited and go back to hear bitter words of friends and relatives or live like this for another year. Should I follow my dreams? What are my dreams? Could u counsel me, please?

    Thanks! But, I don’t know what would make me happy, or what I’m good at? Yeah, I too think I’m mentally ill.

    Your way is the most likeable man, but now, or after two years, I have to come at a decision…………….

  5. Ahem…I don’t think I am an authority to counsel someone. “What are my dreams” is something you have to ask yourself. Don’t mistake your hobbies as your dreams. And if you ask me, you can put your mind into whatever you are doing right now. Its not such a bad option if you think you are capable to go ahead with it? If not engineering, then its better that you think it over and then talk to your family.
    Nobody can tell you what your dreams are. They are yours and yours only. 🙂

  6. Well I used to dream of becoming a director…. even wrote some short films, but what if i’m not good at it? thats the thing that worries me. Like they say that its not necessary that u’ll be good at what u like, and u should do what u r good at.
    For now, i have decided to let it be…… continue to do what i’d planned to do….

  7. Lol, not knowing what you’re good at isn’t mental illness, it’s normality, especially since you’re 16. I’m not saying that everyone gets wiser with age (lol, I totally didn’t) but right now, of course you’re going to be confused.

    So the thing to do is keep your options open, keep looking at other careers and don’t commit yourself to something that you might regret in a few years. There’s loads of time for you to decide!

    And what Amit said is right, family consultation helps…but in the end, it’s your decision.

    And I agree with Sneezy. Don’t stress, take it easy, work hard but play harder. Whoohoo for GTA!

  8. @tigger
    I guess u r right! But the problem is I have somewhat committed to iit. I mean +1 is the basic for any career…. so if i wanna go into another field, i gotta choose now. Well, I have never gotten so stressed about anything except this, and now, i’m as light as i could be, no tension, just concentrate on what is b4 me……..There u go, u give good advice tooo.

  9. 🙂 Dont feel guilty if you dont know what to do with your life. The most interesting people i know, didnt know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting forty year olds still dont! Just go with the flow and dream a lot. Maybe you can share here too if they aint all wet 🙂 !

  10. @Tremlanquer
    no, they aren’t wet, and i do share my dreams. But do u really think that no sense of ur life’s direction would make u happy?

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